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The World's Best Bad Golf Tournament: A Documentary About Bad Golf
 
 
“This documentary on Bad Golf would give Leonard Pinth-Garnell a myoclonic seizure. I loved every bit of the nonsense!” -- Gary McCord
 
 
 
   
   
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John Barmon, actor who played Spalding Smails
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PLAYER PROFILES > ALBERT J. DOERMAET, JR., TOURNAMENT FOUNDER

In order to see more profiles, please click on the player pictures above.

Where are you from?
Kildeer, IL

Do you prefer boxers or briefs?
I've recently been wearing a relovutionary new type that is actually a combination of the two. Boxer briefs. They're like snug boxers. very nice.

What do you do for a living?
I'm the CEO of ACI, a waste management company.

How long have you been playing golf?
It's actually been almost 30 years. Hard to believe. I used to be a high school football coach and took up the game when I got into business, when I no longer had the time to coach.

If you could pick a dream foursome, who would be in it?
Probably Tom Hansen. Tom is my swing coach and he's in the movie. Really a peach of guy. With Tom, I'd probably want to play with President Bush, Condoleeza Rice, and Jack Nicklaus.

Who are your personal heroes?
Richard Nixon, Jack Welch, Mother Theresa (I'm very interested in charity and philanthropy)

What’s your favorite food?
lobster

Are congruent parts of congruent triangles congruent?
I think it depends on the sizes of the angles, but I'm not sure.

Republicans or democrats?  Or Nader?
Republicans. The bottom line is that they let you keep more of what you earn.

What professional golfer are you most like?  Why?
Craig Stadler. It's obvious why.

What’s your favorite color?
Probably silver. The first six portajohns I bought were silver. Now all our cans are blue or green, but I got started with silver ones.

What’s the strongest part of your golf game?
Putting. Tom says I have loads of natural putting ability.

Blondes or brunettes?
I've never been too picky.

What’s the weakest part of your golf game?
Depends on how I'm feeling. And it really seems to change each time I go out. Some days I get off the tee perfect and I can't chip. Other days, all my chips are perfect, but I can't hit it off the tee.

What do you think is the biggest problem currently facing our world?
Health insurance costs for employees are bleeding me dry. Before too long, doctors aren't going to be able to afford to go to the doctor. They're gonna have to treat themselves. You can guess what that means for the rest of us.

What will you do with the $250,000 if you win?
I have about four charities I support. The high school where I used to coach, the anti-cruelty society, a youth group for hoodlums who are trying to get it together and a homeless shelter.

Is Al Doermaet a.) brilliant b.) crazy c.) the dumbest f&%#@* guy you’ve ever seen d.) all of the above?  Why? 
Finally a question where I actually know the answer. A.

What’s your favorite movie (other than handicapped)?
Die Hard. I own it on VHS and DVD. Probably watch it once every two months. It gets better and better.

Note: These answers, submitted in writing by Mr. Doermaet, have not been edited or altered in any way. Please excuse any typos or factual inconsistencies.

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