West Town Productions

The World's Best Bad Golf Tournament: A Documentary About Bad Golf
“This documentary on Bad Golf would give Leonard Pinth-Garnell a myoclonic seizure. I loved every bit of the nonsense!” -- Gary McCord
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John Barmon, actor who played Spalding Smails
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In order to see more profiles, please click on the player pictures above.

Where are you from? 
Kalamazoo, Michigan; the birthplace of Edna Ferber, one of the few American writers I truly respect.

Do you prefer boxers or briefs? 
That is not an appropriate question.

What do you do for a living?
I am an educator.  I teach honors freshman English and World Literature to the upper classes.

How long have you been playing golf? 
Since I was 7 years old.  That is when I discovered my gift for writing.  I realized that the solitude of the game of golf was a perfect escape for me.  A chance for me to be alone with my thoughts and nature.  The battle of man vs. course only heightened the experience for me.

If you could pick a dream foursome, who would be in it? 
William Shakespeare, John Keating, Dick Wolf, and J.K. Rowling

Who are your personal heroes? 
Ernest Hemmingway and Ayn Rand.  If I have to explain why you wouldn't understand.

What's your favorite food?
The Filet de boeuf de Salers at Les Deux Magots in Paris.

Are congruent parts of congruent triangles congruent? 
Congruent parts of a congruent triangle are congruent.  This is a complicated way to say something obvious: if two things are identical, then every part of them is identical too. For example, if I wrote you a letter and made a Xerox copy of it, then the first word on both copies would be the same. If I copied a photograph of myself, then the left ear on both copies would look the same.

In a proof, you often want to show that two line segments are the same length. If you can use theorems to show that two triangles of which these segments are part are congruent, then since every part of the two triangles is the same, these sides must be the same too.

The trick is to make sure you choose CORRESPONDING parts! If you compared two pictures of me, but claimed that the left ear of one had to be the same as the right ear of the other, you would be wrong. One ear may have been injured or have an earring in it, and the other not. You can only say they must be the same if they are both the same ear on identical pictures. The same is true with triangles. That's why, when we talk about congruence, we have to name the triangles in the same order. These triangles are congruent:

          B             E
          +             +
        /  \          /  \
      /     \       /     \
    +--------+    +--------+
   A          C  D          F

I have to say that ABC is congruent to DEF, to show the order in which I am taking the triangles; then sides AB and DE are congruent, and so are BC and EF. I can't say that triangles ABC and EFD are congruent, because AB is not the same length as EF. But when I state clearly which parts correspond, then I can say that AB and DE are corresponding parts, and therefore must be congruent. If they weren't, the triangles wouldn't be the same!

When do you use CPCTC? When you know that two triangles are congruent, and want to say something about their angles or sides. Why? In order to prove congruence of angles or segments.

I also do math.

Republicans or democrats?  Or Nader?
My ideologies are not conducive to membership in any of today's established political parties.

What professional golfer are you most like?  Why? 
Luke Donald.  We have similar interests and hobbies, as well as educational background.  He also appreciates the finer things in life.

What's your favorite color? 
Purple is the color of passion.

What's the strongest part of your golf game? 
My course management.  Golf is 110% mental, 1% physical.

Blondes or brunettes? 

What's the weakest part of your golf game? 
I try not to think negatively about myself.

What do you think is the biggest problem currently facing our world?  
Where to begin....

What will you do with the $250,000 if you win? 
My plan is to move to Hollywood and continue my writing.

Is Al Doermaet a.) brilliant b.) crazy c.) the dumbest f&%#@* guy you've ever seen d.) all of the above?  Why? 
The man is apparently is a success, so he must be doing something right.

What's your favorite movie (other than handicapped)? 
Das Boot.  I really identify with the Captain.

Note: These answers, submitted in writing by Mr. Coyne, have not been edited or altered in any way. Please excuse any typos or factual inconsistencies.

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